The Customer Experiences We Often Overlook

Organisations invest considerable time and money into understanding their customers. We collect feedback, analyse satisfaction scores, review complaints and look for opportunities to improve the customer experience.

But how much do we really know about the experiences we don't hear about?

Consider a parent who takes their child to a museum, only to find the environment overwhelming. Perhaps their child becomes distressed, they feel the judgement of people around them, and they decide it's easier to leave.

They might not complain. They might not complete a customer satisfaction survey. They might simply decide not to return.

Or consider someone living with anxiety who finds the process of booking an appointment so stressful that they abandon it altogether.

Perhaps an older person living with dementia struggles to navigate an unfamiliar environment, or a customer finds it difficult to understand the information being provided but feels too embarrassed to ask for help.

These are all customer experiences.

Yet they're not necessarily the ones organisations hear about.

Are we only listening to the people who can access our services?

When organisations seek customer feedback, they're often asking people who have already engaged with their services.

But this creates an important question.

What about the people who aren't there?

The person who decided against booking. The family who chose somewhere else. The customer who stopped attending. Or the individual who would love to participate but doesn't feel confident that their needs will be understood.

Their absence doesn't tell us why they're missing.

And without making an effort to understand those experiences, we risk designing services around the needs of the people who already find them accessible.

The experiences that extend beyond one person

One aspect of customer experience I think we often underestimate is the ripple effect.

Imagine a family planning a day out. One member has sensory sensitivities and finds busy, noisy environments difficult.

The family might make their decision about where to go based on whether that one person will feel comfortable.

The same might be true of a group of friends choosing a restaurant, someone arranging a holiday with an older relative, or a parent selecting activities for their children.

When an experience doesn't work for one person, it can influence the decisions of several others.

And the opposite is equally important.

When someone feels understood, supported and welcome, the impact can extend well beyond that individual. Their confidence grows. Their family feels reassured. They might recommend the experience to others.

Creating more inclusive experiences isn't simply about meeting individual needs. It can open up opportunities for entire families, friendship groups and communities.

Understanding what people don't always tell us

There are many reasons why someone might not share a difficult experience.

They might feel embarrassed, fear being judged, assume nothing will change or simply not have the energy to explain what went wrong.

For some people, having to repeatedly explain their needs is itself exhausting.

And sometimes customers don't identify something as an accessibility barrier. They simply know that an experience didn't feel comfortable or that something was more difficult than it needed to be.

This is where empathy, curiosity and customer closeness become so important.

Rather than relying solely on complaints and satisfaction scores, we need to create opportunities to hear from people whose experiences might otherwise remain invisible.

We need to ask better questions, listen without judgement and be prepared to challenge our assumptions.

Turning understanding into action

Of course, listening is only part of the picture.

We need to consider how customer insight reaches the people who can make meaningful changes.

That includes senior leaders, managers, service designers and the people delivering experiences every day.

Sometimes the most valuable insights come from relatively small moments.

A member of staff who notices a customer struggling. A parent who explains why they stopped attending an activity. Someone who describes the relief of being offered an alternative way to communicate.

These experiences can help us understand not just what needs to change, but why it matters.

And when we combine personal experiences with wider customer research and data, we can make more informed decisions about how to improve our services.

Who are we missing?

For me, creating more inclusive customer experiences begins with being willing to look beyond what we already know.

To consider the people whose experiences aren't reflected in our feedback, whose needs might differ from our expectations, and whose voices aren't always heard.

Because the absence of complaints doesn't necessarily mean the absence of barriers.

And a positive customer satisfaction score doesn't mean everyone is having a positive experience.

Sometimes the most important customer experiences are the ones we never get to hear about.

At Seats at the Table, I work with organisations to better understand the needs and experiences of neurodivergent people, helping them identify overlooked barriers and create more inclusive customer and visitor experiences.

Because everyone deserves to feel considered, including the people whose experiences we don't always see.